Are you going to be a full-time babysitter in your retirement?

People have told me that one of their fears about retirement is that their adult children will expect them to care for the grandchildren on a day-to-day basis or to change their plans at a moment’s notice.

If this is a concern for you, then you need to think about whether or not this is something you want to do.

Once you are clear on what it is you want and are willing to do, have a conversation with your adult children around expectations and boundaries.

This may be an uncomfortable conversation for you to have. However, doing something you really don’t want to do has a cost on you and your relationship with your adult children.

Be honest with yourself and your adult children even if it means disappointing them. At the very least they will know where you stand.

Do you talk to your partner about retirement?

Many people have no idea when their partner is going to retire. They just know their own date of retirement.

Since retirement is a HUGE change in someone’s life and will certainly impact a relationship, it’s important to find out what you’re each thinking.

The best action to take is to talk about it openly and honestly and there is certainly a lot to discuss such as:

  • Potential retirement dates
  • Finances / budget / financial planning
  • Tax Planning
  • Insurance needs (house, health, disability, long-term care; etc.)
  • Medical, health and dental benefit plans
  • Revising or writing your Last Will and Testament; Living Will or Health Care Directive; Identifying Power of Attorneys for Financial and Health Care (Health Care Proxy); Trusts
  • Expectations and desires; and
  • Your bucket lists that each of you want to experience together as well as apart.

Once you know what each other is thinking then you will be in a much better position to start planning!

Another situation that can happen is that you have been retired for a few years and soon your better half will be joining you. This will certainly be a transition for both of you which could be difficult and rocky or smooth and exciting or a combination of all of these.

Someone recently told me, “It was on my husband’s first official day of retirement, when he wandered into the kitchen, and questioned my ability of how to fill the dishwasher.” They had a good talk afterwards to work out a few things! 🙂

Again, the more you communicate with your partner the better prepared you both will be – talk about expectations, boundaries, challenges, obstacles and the opportunities that will be available to the both of you!

How to avoid running out of money in retirement

Running out of money in retirement.

It’s a really scary thought.

It’s actually one of the biggest fears people have about transitioning into this next chapter of their lives.

Many people also worry they won’t have enough money to live the life they want.

And that right there folks is the reason why planning for retirement mentally and emotionally first, and then working with a financial planner to flesh out your plans even further, will help give you the bigger picture.

If you don’t know how you want to live your life in retirement, how will you know if you have enough money?

Planning ahead is the key to alleviating your fears.

– Do you want to travel the world six months out of the year?

– Do you want to buy a motorhome and travel?

– Do you want to buy a recreational property outside of Canada?

– Are you staying close to home because of grandchildren, family and /or volunteer commitments?

– Will you have enough money to maintain your property, pay down your mortgage (if you still have one), pay all of your day-to-day costs such as utilities, food, insurance?

– Will you need money to help out your adult children?

There are so many paths you can take and each path may require a different level of financing. The more clarity you have about how you want to live your life in retirement and know your personal needs and goals — the more accurate your financial plan will be.

If your goals or life circumstances change such as you want to buy a new house, go on a trip of a lifetime, a change in marital status, become ill, etc., it is best to check in with your financial planner.

They will be able to look at your entire financial picture and you will be better informed as to how it may impact you in the long run.

So, as you get closer to retirement, start planning for the next phase of life by identifying your needs and goals to ensure you’re going to be on track financially.

If you realize that some of your goals may require more money than you have set aside, then you have time to make some adjustments which could include increasing your savings, decreasing your spending, working longer, transitioning to part-time, etc.

Your financial planner can help you look at the different options and what might work for you.

And on the mental, emotional, dreamy side of planning for retirement, I’ve got your back.

My Power Up Your Retirement Program is an online educational program which provides a high-quality video training series, group coaching, an online community and other educational resources focused on helping you transition into a successful retirement. The focus of the program is not financial.

Instead, it focuses on helping you plan psychologically for a successful retirement. The goal is to help you plan for your transition from working full-time to retirement post-career and help you manage worry, sadness and fear so your retirement will be happy, meaningful and purposeful.

Check it out today at https://www.powerupyourretirement.com/.

And once you’ve done the hard work, it’s time to book an appointment with your financial advisor.

Happy planning. 🙂

Keeping up can be exhausting

Do you notice that people go faaaaast! Too fast? “Keeping up” can be exhausting.

Slowing down can also be hard for those of us who have been working hard all our lives.

How do we put the breaks on the train without causing too much tension?

It’s going to take effort to change the expectations you have of yourself to “produce” as much or “get it all done today”.

Now more than ever, it’s time to let go of those old ideas that don’t serve you anymore. Why not challenge yourself to:

– Have more slow days
– Stop making unrealistic deadlines for yourself
– Sit down in a cafe and have a coffee instead of taking it to go
– Allow yourself a sleep-in
– Do your chores at a slower pace
– Breathe

Ease into the new paradigm: Plan to let people go around you, you’re retired 😉

What do you do to take it slower?

Out with the old!

Elizabeth Gilbert changed our lives when she wrote, “Eat, Pray, Love” and told us about her journey of courage.

Uncovering her truth to live a life of freedom and empowerment, she spoke directly to our hearts – to that place that only we know is real.

We were touched when we realized that her story is like so many of our stories… that we deserve real happiness and love. Many of us are ready for this! We are tired of the old mental patterns – the ones that put us down and steal our joy.

When we get tired of our own bulls#!t – it means the time is now to use that momentum to put a new practice into reality.

Maybe the new practice can be a simple mantra for yourself? A mantra is like a mini-meditation. A couple of my faves are: “Too Blessed to Be Stressed” and “The Best Project You’ll Ever Work On Is You”.

Do you have a mantra that helps you?

CBC’s The Stats of Life on Retirement

CBC’s The Stats of Life did an interesting episode on retirement.

We meet a 72-year-old widow who placed ads seeking like-minded women to form an “intentional community”; an 82-year-old woman who wants to do even more volunteering despite her failing eyesight; and a couple in their 60s who have planned every aspect of their retirement have one more thing to do – talk to their children about their end of life plans.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this episode.

Fear of loss of health

My health means everything and I am doing all that I can to be in the best shape possible so I can continue to have a great quality of life in retirement.

If you want to have great health in retirement, but you haven’t donned track shoes since your last gym class; you don’t eat well, sleep well, take time to recharge your batteries, are often stressed, or are generally in poor health, then you are at a crossroads and you have an important decision to make.

How do you want to feel and what do you want to do in the second half of your life?

If the answer is that you want to be able to play with your grandchildren, travel, hike, live relatively pain free; and feel excited about your life, then you may need to make some changes NOW so that you can retire in relatively good shape. So, what can you do?

Here are a few tips to help you make some changes.

  • Check in with your Health Practitioner
  • Have regular checkups (yes guys, that means you too). Make sure you understand your test results – what is normal? Too high? Too low?
  • Discuss what changes you want to make – do you want to shed a few pounds; quit smoking, start exercising, sleep better; eat a healthier diet
  • Talk to your doctor about an exercise program and they can help you get started
  • Think about what kind of exercise you would like to do – it can be as simple as walking every day
    • you can visit your pantry and pull out a can of peas, so you can flex your biceps and triceps while watching TV
    • you can exercise with friends, join a land or water class at your local Y; or play a team sport (Pickle Ball anyone?)
  • It might even be worth your while to speak with a personal trainer –they can do an initial assessment, discuss your goals, and develop a fitness plan for you whether that’s exercising at the gym, at home or a combo.
  • Whatever you choose to do, what’s important is that you like what you’re doing and having fun!!
  • Eat a healthy, balanced diet – speak to Health Care Practitioner about this but you know what to do – cut back on the sugar, salt, unhealthy fat, red meat, alcohol, and increase your intake of veggies, fruits, nuts, seeds, healthy protein, healthy fats and water.
  • Get enough quality ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ’s to feel well rested
  • Keep stress at bay: Learn to deal with stress –
    • recognize your stressors and stress signals
    • take a few minutes for yourself every day – a relaxed cup of coffee / tea; a bubble bath; read a chapter: listen to music; or go for a walk
    • talk to someone close when you are dealing with an issue that is troubling you
    • develop some ways to decrease stress that work for you whether that is meditating, being more mindful or more resilient
  • If you are feeling overly stressed, anxious, overwhelmed, overcommitted, out of balance, feeling like you have little or no control over your life, or depressed, speak with your health care provider to help you deal with these very important issues
  • Reach out to your support system
  • Stay engaged with your community and maintain healthy relationships with family, friends, coworkers
  • Laugh often
  • Focus on the positives in your life and practice an ‘attitude of gratitude.’

Fears can be debilitating as they can stop us from achieving our dreams and doing the things we want to do. So, don’t let your fears stop you from living the life you want.

Identify, understand and take action to overcome your fears. These are important steps in preparing yourself psychologically for your retirement.

 Visit www.powerupyourretirement.com to watch the free ‘Ten Most Common Fears About Retirement’ Masterclass video.

Fear of having to go back to work

Studies show that more and more retirees are either delaying their retirement past the age of 65 or going back to work.

In 2015, StatsCan, found that 53.5 per cent of men and almost 39 per cent of women who were 65 reported working during the year.

Some reasons for delaying retirement past 65 or going back to work include – not ready to retire; don’t have enough money; bored; lonely; want to meet new people; want to keep busy; etc.

If you’re not financially ready, think about what you can do before you retire to either increase your savings and / or decrease your spending. As already mentioned in this blog, speak to your financial planner to help you develop your financial plan.

Perhaps you will need to delay your retirement and work a few more years or consider going from full-time to part-time work or even do some consulting work.

If you no longer want to do the work you are currently doing, but you still need to work, then are you willing to look for a new job? What does that new job look like? Start thinking about it now and start taking steps towards transitioning to a new job.

If you think you will be bored and lonely, review these two blogs and start taking action before you retire.

 

Fear of social isolation in retirement

Loss of social network is a big concern among pre-retirees. When you will retire from your career, you more than likely won’t be seeing your colleagues and / or work friends everyday but that doesn’t mean that they are gone from your life forever. If you had good work and personal relationships with your co-workers, then these friendships may be strong enough to continue once you have left work.

Like all relationships, however, you need to make time and work on your friendships to stay connected.

If you don’t really have any close friends at work or outside of work, then you may need to nurture your existing relationships and even expand your network.

Some ways to do that are to:

  • Identify your interests and hobbies and join a local club e.g. if you love gardening, look for local gardening clubs

  • volunteer for a personal cause

  • join service clubs or associations – there are lots of service clubs who welcome new members, identify the service clubs in your area.

  • A club that I will be joining when I retire is PROBUS club. Their goal is to provide fellowship, friendship and fun in their retirement and semi-retirement years. Some of my retired friends are members and they are loving the people they are meeting and the experiences they are having. Visit www.probus.org for more information and for a club near you.

  • attend a class at your local college or

  •  attend community or church events

There are probably lots of events going on in your community so pick up the local paper or read it on-line and get plugged in to find out what is happening in your community.

Visit www.powerupyourretirement.com to watch the ‘Ten Most Common Fears About Retirement’ Masterclass video.